Monday 17 December 2012

Goodbye Dad - Monica


 

Like Denis, I am honoured to speak on behalf of my mother and my brothers and sisters. I think that is appropriate for us to talk today as family members. If any word were to characterise Dad, it would be the word family.  Everything he has done during the 67 years he and Mum have been married has been for the family.

 

All through my school days, Dad worked for what is now the Dept of Primary Industries. With a constantly growing family, a single salary was never enough. (And of course Dad always said that Mum just had 13 children and never worked!) So to supplement that, he usually had a patch of bananas or pineapples where he worked after work and on weekends. Talk about knocking off work to carry coal! Mum slaved just as hard and most of the family did what they could. Even Trish remembers working all day picking beans – when she was 2 years old. With my instinct for self-preservation, I generally volunteered to look after the little ones and not dirty my delicate hands.

 

In those days, workers had only two weeks holiday and Dad made sure that we got away whenever he could afford it. We spent a lot of holidays at Tewantin and Noosa (before it was fashionable). What I remember clearly is the emphasis Mum and Dad placed on their relationship. Usually we had a week all together at the beach and then Aunty Mag came and looked after us while they had a few days away together. Dad and the boys spent a lot of time fishing and I have very clear memories of the odour of sea and salt and smelly bait. My brothers can tell you stories of lessons they learnt from Dad about boating and fishing.

 

Some of his fishing stories have no doubt been embellished by time. However he was a great storyteller. (And on that note, I have recently had Dad’s reminiscences reprinted and there are books at the back for any of our relatives who would like one).  Most people who have read his As I Recall say that whether or not they shared the same experiences, the stories sent them off on similar journeys of memory. Dad had a keen eye for the incongruous and his sense of humour is one of the memories I will carry with me. Right to the end, he had a quick wit and I often heard him chiacking the staff at the nursing home. Last year I was talking about trying to learn Italian. When I said my accent was terrible and I had trouble rolling my ‘r’ s, immediately his mouth twitched into a grin. I had to add, when I pronounce words, not when I walk down the street.

 

We have been incredibly blessed to have had Dad in our lives for so long. His children have appreciated him in their adult lives, his grandchildren are all old enough to remember him and some of the great-grandchildren will have memories to treasure. But it is not only his immediate family who benefited but the wider family as well. As Dad’s brothers and sisters passed on, he tried not to lose touch with his many nieces and nephews. Even those he didn’t see often were important and he liked to keep up with what they were doing. His door was always open and unexpected visitors were a treat for him and Mum. I’m sure he will always be remembered as a devoted family man and, in every sense of the word, a gentle man.

Monica

 

 

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